I helped a man in recovery through a very difficult time in the last months of his life. He was suffering and he was on a morphine drip and using a walker. I walked alongside of him to prevent falls.
When he died, his daughter informed me and we made plans to celebrate his life. Then she cut off all communication with me.
I just wrote the following update to my essay about Tony about a week ago:
“ It has been quite a while since Tony passed away but I often think of him and the joy he brought back into my life. I also think of his daughter and, unfortunately, the misery she brought into my life.
After making plans for a Celebration of Life outing to honor Tony, then offering me his favorite lounge chair to remember him by, she completely cut off all communications with me and ignored anything I sent to her. The Celebration may have gone on without me, I do not know.
I don’t understand this at all! If my father were in similar straits in the last few months of his life and someone helped ease his burdens, I would be forever grateful!
There have been many nights since then where I lay awake, wracking my brain, trying to figure out what I did that made her act this way, but I come up with nothing.
I am hoping that putting this down in writing will ease my inner pain!
As taught to me by my Christian faith, forgiveness is an essential step in recovery. Therefore I truly forgive his daughter and wish her and her family well.”
I also wrote the following years ago in an essay for my children and grandchildren:
“ Et Cetera
Various lessons on life for the children and grandchildren
ANDREW DEVLIN
OCT 30, 2024 AT 6:48 PM
Forgive, But Don't Forget
Forgiveness of those who hurt you costs nothing.
Holding a grudge can cost plenty in terms of peace of mind and loss of a friend or family member's company.
Forgetting can leave you open to being hurt again.”
I love this prayer! Beautiful and fulfilling. Thank u. 🙏
Your timing on forgiveness hit home with me.
I helped a man in recovery through a very difficult time in the last months of his life. He was suffering and he was on a morphine drip and using a walker. I walked alongside of him to prevent falls.
When he died, his daughter informed me and we made plans to celebrate his life. Then she cut off all communication with me.
I just wrote the following update to my essay about Tony about a week ago:
“ It has been quite a while since Tony passed away but I often think of him and the joy he brought back into my life. I also think of his daughter and, unfortunately, the misery she brought into my life.
After making plans for a Celebration of Life outing to honor Tony, then offering me his favorite lounge chair to remember him by, she completely cut off all communications with me and ignored anything I sent to her. The Celebration may have gone on without me, I do not know.
I don’t understand this at all! If my father were in similar straits in the last few months of his life and someone helped ease his burdens, I would be forever grateful!
There have been many nights since then where I lay awake, wracking my brain, trying to figure out what I did that made her act this way, but I come up with nothing.
I am hoping that putting this down in writing will ease my inner pain!
As taught to me by my Christian faith, forgiveness is an essential step in recovery. Therefore I truly forgive his daughter and wish her and her family well.”
I also wrote the following years ago in an essay for my children and grandchildren:
“ Et Cetera
Various lessons on life for the children and grandchildren
ANDREW DEVLIN
OCT 30, 2024 AT 6:48 PM
Forgive, But Don't Forget
Forgiveness of those who hurt you costs nothing.
Holding a grudge can cost plenty in terms of peace of mind and loss of a friend or family member's company.
Forgetting can leave you open to being hurt again.”
The full essays are available at:
https://andrewdevlin.substack.com/p/my-friend-tony?r=ugzy3&utm_medium=ios
And
https://andrewdevlin.substack.com/p/et-cetera-various-lessons-on-life?r=ugzy3&utm_medium=ios
HAVE A GREAT AND BLESSED DAY!