#20 From Observation to Understanding: My Christian Awakening
Building a Personal Relationship with the Divine
Jeremiah 29:12-13 ESV
«Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you.
You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.»
For those of you that have been following me from the beginning, I’ve shared that the Lord revealed himself to me on October 3rd, 2024, a mere 9 months ago from the time of this writing.
There was a lot of thirst amidst the confusion, of what does it mean to be a Christian?!
I read many books, listened and watched hundreds of hours of sermons from known leaders in the faith both recent and some going as far back as the 50s.
I observed the behaviors of many who professed to be Christians on the internet, on televisions, in my real life surroundings and at a few Churches in the area close to mom’s house, where I am currently posted.
If I am honest with myself, much of what I witnessed was not in harmony with the (brief) experience I had on that night of October 3rd or what the Bible speaks to me.
Things like pastors speaking or promoting secular, fleshly ideas from the pulpit.
Churches with doors that are locked the whole week except for a few hours on Sunday.
“Christians” that spew hate and division on the internet.
Bible study groups in which speakers are comfortable cursing and swearing in between testimonies and bible readings.
“Christian” social media influencers that spend more time on the promotion of products and services than on spreading Jesus’ words.
Different “Christian” groups hurling insulting language at other “Christian” groups that create more divide than unity.
These are just to name a few of the inconsistencies that I’ve felt and experienced which brought disharmony to my personal understanding in the beginning, as brief as it were.
Thinking back on those early days, if I had to send a message to myself it would be this;
Focus on building your own personal relationship with the Holy Spirit.
Getting into the habit of speaking with him regularly.
Learning to recognize the sound of His voice and the manners in which He speaks to me.
Getting into the habit of being obedient, when He commands.
Learning to recognize when He is trying to work around me and through me for the benefit of others around me and in my life.
Nextly, well how do you achieve these things;
Read the Bible
Listen to the Bible
Pray regularly. Have dedicated times set aside specifically for praying daily.
Be militantly mindful about the media you consume. Movies, music, podcasts, etc.
Journaling daily. I mostly write, but I also record voice memos to myself. Some may be inclined to play music, write a poem or sing a song. These are all methods in which we can use to capture and organize our thoughts, feelings and find TRUE understanding in Him.
Treasure those boring “in-between” moments throughout the day instead of pulling my phone out of my pocket.
So, yes, if I were to send myself a message in those earlier days in my walk, above all else, that would be the message.
When I had my first conscious encounter with the Holy Spirit last October, there were two commands.
First is that I was idolizing my business. I was to end this and focus on caring for my family, specifically my mother. That was the only job, I was to have in that moment and to trust that He would provide for everything else life was demanding of me at the time.
Second was to set time aside daily to pray and to get to know Him. This began with 2 minutes of prayer every morning before starting my day. Though that’s evolved to something more comprehensive and integrative over these last few months.
Than I had silence from Him for months. But I obeyed those two commands.
Things are different now. Everything is different.
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Shashue Monrauch